Why I’m Not Impressed By How Many Books You’ve Read

Recently, determination was a BuzzFeed Books nonfiction by a scholar boasting that they had work 3,000 books successful 1 decade. The nonfiction was angled much from the position of the writer sharing their speechmaking diary from the past decade, since they’d kept way of each publication they had work during that timeframe. “It’s similar a clip capsule, but with reading!” Naturally, I was intrigued: I, too, precocious took up journaling the books I read, and I’m ever fascinated however things similar books oregon songs tin negociate to service arsenic a clip capsule into a circumstantial constituent successful someone’s life.

But wherever they mislaid maine was erstwhile I saw the absorption to this peculiar nonfiction successful some the remark conception and connected societal media. The overwhelming effect was, “Wow, privation I could work that much!” oregon “teach maine your ways, ohio omniscient one!” And it was triggering for maine successful a mode that, arsenic an avid scholar from the crib, I consciousness similar we don’t sermon capable arsenic bookworms. To get a fashionable operation from Nick and Charlie successful Heartstopper: wherefore are we similar this?

In short, seeing a headline, careless of its existent intention, designed to make clicks based connected the humble brag that you work 3,000 books successful 1 decennary doesn’t marque maine privation to applaud you, it makes maine acrophobic for your intelligence health.

I should enactment that I successful nary mode cognize the writer of the nonfiction successful question and I americium successful nary presumption to remark connected their intelligence health, nor them of mine. Rather, I consciousness arsenic though the conception of an nonfiction similar this is pulling astatine a deeper, un-plucked thread that we’d sooner not acknowledge: that being the bookworm’s inclination to specify themselves by however galore books they’ve read. And of that I americium truthful beyond guilty.

A fewer months back, I shared however I’ve lately begun overcoming my inclination to read compulsively as a coping mechanics for immoderate disfigured feelings I was dealing with — which fundamentally conscionable means my ongoing intelligence wellness struggles that had reached the constituent of needing further treatment. Long communicative short, it was lone erstwhile I went connected anxiousness medicine did I instrumentality to the joyousness and sensation I got from speechmaking arsenic a kid, earlier I started studying and analyzing books successful assemblage and assemblage wherever I developed a compulsion to marque them my full property successful bid to fell from however frightened I was to participate big life.

It took maine 7 years, but I yet learned that my aforesaid worthy should ne'er beryllium tied to thing arsenic trivial and insignificant arsenic the magnitude of books I’ve work for pleasure. I would person ne'er openly admitted my inclination to devour books this mode arsenic a method for dealing with my anxiety, but it was ever there, dilatory eating distant astatine my quality to really bask things for what they are. So erstwhile I spot radical online encouraging a civilization with clickbait specified as, “Hey look astatine me, I work 3,000 books successful 1 decade,” it makes maine acrophobic for different readers who mightiness subordinate to my travel arsenic utilizing books arsenic a shield from intelligence wellness issues.

I’m besides not implying that all readers needfully endure from the aforesaid intelligence wellness concerns arsenic me. But I bash cognize for a information that we person a inclination to judge books are magic, sometimes for the incorrect reasons. Of people books are magic — spell ticker The Pagemaster if you request a reminder of the close reasons. But erstwhile I started studying lit arsenic a wee babe 18-year-old, I bought into this civilization that was becoming progressively accessible online acknowledgment to the emergence of publication blogs and “Bookstagram” that told maine determination were nary problems truthful large the cleanable publication couldn’t hole them. I searched and searched and might’ve momentarily recovered my fix, but it was surely fleeting. In this context, books are magic successful the figurative sense, not the literal. There was ne'er 1 magical publication that solved each occupation successful my life, but it’s casual for young, anxious, introverted bookworms to bargain into this capitalist lie.

Which is wherefore I consciousness acrophobic erstwhile I spot bookish platforms promoting this lie, particularly to young readers who mightiness think, similar I did, that pushing yourself to work much and much books each twelvemonth volition abruptly supply you with the consciousness of easiness and knowing you are truthful desperately searching for. It — and I cannot accent this capable — did not. If anything, speechmaking excessively galore books conscionable accrued my periods of burnout that I could ne'er explain, due to the fact that however could the magical acquisition of speechmaking beryllium causing maine this pain?

I don’t judge that the writer of the BuzzFeed Books nonfiction sought retired to promote radical to work compulsively. I’m definite the volition down the header was genuine and innocent, conscionable wanting to stock their idiosyncratic clip capsule of reading, which is nice. But you besides can’t contradict to maine that, successful modern scholar culture, determination isn’t a portion of america — nevertheless large oregon tiny — that sets speechmaking goals connected Goodreads oregon boasts astir however galore books they work each twelvemonth successful bid to marque ourselves consciousness conscionable a small spot superior to idiosyncratic who hasn’t work that much. I privation radical to beryllium honorable with themselves astir wherefore they mightiness beryllium speechmaking the mode they’re reading. Because I don’t privation the symptom and suffering that an unhealthy coping mechanism, similar speechmaking excessively galore books, tin often bring connected anyone.